Deadline

Cortez Johnson

Tick tock

Tick tock

I Can't seem to beat this clock

Depression is a constant pounding

A knock, Knock, Knock

It's sounds when I'm feeling stressed

So basically I'm perpetually pressed

Tick Tock


I'm Stuck between a hard place and solid rock

I'm lost in the ocean no place dock

I did what y'all told me

Dropped that anchor like it was the key

But the game's rigged: there ain't even a lock

Tick tock


I'm counting down to depression

Overwhelmed by what I've been suppressin

Guess I never learned my lesson

Tick tock


I'm Feeling dismissed,

Unloved,

Only touched by The scars on my wrists

I'm Sinking further into the abyss

My double consciousness ain't fixin this!

Tick tock

But I Can't let them see I'm drowning

Need to Fix my face

Gotta win this race

Gotta make my case

Gotta Stay straight lace

But

I

Can't

keep

pace

Tick Tock

I'm falling behind


Going out my mind

Can't rewind

There's no God damn time!

Tick Tock

Tick Tock


My head ain't

but my Tank is empty

I said

My heart ain't,

But my words are empty...

Oh I see

Y'all ain't got no sympathy

Tick Tock


Y'all ain't got no empathy

Tick Tock


Indifference stings like a thousand bees

Tick Tock


guess it's just me

Guess I'm crazy

Tick Tock


Or is it

I'm just lazy

But Don't worry

Tick Tock


Doc says he'll give me a chemical lobotomy

Prescribe a remedy

Before I stir up a frenzy

My Times up;

Tick Tock


time to erase me.

Gotta be quick

Say something and make it stick

Tick Tock


Let's take a deep dive inside my head

Haven't left my bed

For 2 weeks

Guess I'm too weak

Prognosis is looking bleak

Tick Tock


Feel myself starting tweak

Guess I really did peak

Tick Tock


Next time, I'll remake myself in your image

A better image

A brighter image

A whiter image

Tick Tock


Trying to look for safety

I'll join your community

Seeking total anonymity

I'll get lost in the ambiguity

Tick Tock


But This white mask aint hiding my black body

This fake smile ain't foolin nobody

Tick Tock


So I fall flat

Guess that's that

Tick Tock


They say it takes strength to accept the things I cannot change, I disagree

Sounds a whole lot like complacency

Submitting to some Colonial supremacy

One way ticket straight to mundanity.

I'm done with Serenity

Tick Tock


Broken prayers don't mend this kind of Melancholy

Tick Tock

The pills provide a temporary solution

how can I explain? I'm not high...

I'm actually feeling pretty low.

The Meds mess with my flow

Tried praying y'know you never know...

I tried crying but these feelings just won't go

Tick Tock


Your pity highlights my isolation

I don't need help, I need absolution

Can anyone relieve this hurt in me?

Instead I get your apathy

that Meaningless I'm sorry....

Tick Tock


Your silence brings only condemnation

Is it entertaining? Did I win?

I didn't know I was up for consideration.

My ignominy is a special kind of humiliation

Tick Tock


So unlike this depression,

I think I'll fade away... nothing more than an apparition.

Tick Tock


No time left for deliberation

Tick To--

Nah you don't deserve a resolution...

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